No One Cares What You Drive

That is, of course, except you. If you’re reading this, you’re probably one of two kinds of people. First, you agree with the headline and are intrigued to find out more about the topic. You drive the car you need to in order to get through the day, but that’s about it. Second, you strongly disagree with the title of the article and are almost offended by it. You’ve spent a lot of (your parent’s) time and money on your automobile; no one can take that away from you. (Except your parents…)

This is intended to apply more to Los Angeles, particularly west of downtown. We’re looking at Santa Monica, West LA, Beverly Hills, Hollywood, etc. Everyone that lives here and has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on a vehicle, or more so, wants people to think they have, here are a few reasons why no one cares.

  1. We don’t believe that it belongs to you. Mom and/or Dad, or some relative, bought that car for you. We’re not impressed in any way whatsoever that they’re taking care of you. We’d give you much more credit for buying a used junker with money that you actually earned through an honest job. So sorry.
  2. We still don’t believe that it belongs to you. License plates can be your best friend or worst enemy. If you have a car that has ANY dealer plates on it, we absolutely don’t believe that it is your property. You went to the dealer with your parent’s Black Card and let them hold onto it while you drove the car that “you’re interested in buying” around. Mom and Dad never knew so shame on you. Get real plates next time to try to fool people into thinking you own it.
  3. We really still don’t believe that it belongs to you. Even if you have real plates on the luxury car, we’re going to automatically think you payed $100 to rent it for an hour from that place down on Lincoln in Venice. We know you didn’t steal it because you don’t have it in you to pull that off. When you take a selfie with the car in your gym clothes with your workout bag in front of Gold’s Gym Venice, we all are aware that you’re about to get that car right back to the rental place before you owe another hour.
  4. Super expensive cars aren’t cool anymore. Why? Because cool people don’t drive them anymore. Cribs and Pimp My Ride lost their popularity a long time ago. Top A-List celebrities drive normal (or more normal) cars to try to keep attention away from them. You’ll see some posts in the future about people who clearly want to be famous and they’re using their car to accomplish that. For the last two years the cool cars were Chevy Volts and anything made by Tesla. While that might change, it won’t change back to Rolls Royce Phantoms and $400k Ferraris.
  5.  We don’t take YOU seriously. Your car is nice and whether you own it or not, whether you wasted all that money on it or not, you’re an awful driver. Why are the worst drivers in LA those who “drive professionally” or people with the nicest cars? Well, if you stopped texting “your agent” or looking at yourself in the mirror, you’d probably do a better job staying in your lane. How can your indicators not work on such an expensive car? You should get that looked at.

There you have just a few of the endless reasons why it doesn’t matter whether you drive a car that looks like it crossed the Mexican border late at night when no one was looking or a car that costs as much as house in the shadier parts of LA. If you have any more entertaining ones, feel free to leave them in the comments below.

(FYI – We love the car in the featured image. We need more of that on the streets.)


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